Recording your funeral wishes in New Zealand

What choices do you have in New Zealand?

In New Zealand there are five options available: burial, burial at sea, cremation, water cremation (aquamation), and donating your body to medical science. Each one carries its own practical requirements and its own meaning, and none is the right answer for everyone.

Burial provides a special place where family, whānau and friends can visit and remember someone who has died. Cemeteries are managed by local councils and each will have their own rules and regulations. In New Zealand, burials are limited by law to official cemeteries and natural burial grounds, or traditional urupā (Māori burial grounds).

Cremation has become the most common choice for New Zealanders. It has been estimated that about 70% of New Zealanders choose cremation. Cremation provides greater flexibility when choosing a final resting place, since you are not restricted to specific places of burial. Ashes can be buried in a cemetery or in special ashes memorial areas. Some families scatter them in a family plot or memorial garden, at sea, or in a favourite place.

New Zealand law does not prevent scattering in many public areas, but local councils may have rules about where you can place ashes. If you wish to scatter ashes on private land, you need permission from the property owner.

A newer option is now available for those who want a gentler environmental footprint. New Zealand's first water crematorium opened in Christchurch in June 2025. Water cremation, also known as aquamation, uses a process that mimics nature's way of returning a person to the earth, with up to 90% less energy consumption and significantly reduced carbon emissions. It is currently only available in Christchurch, though interest from councils around the country suggests availability may expand.

For those wishing to donate their body to medical science, timing is critical. New Zealand medical schools do not have a constant requirement for donations. If you are interested in this option it is essential that arrangements are made prior to death and that the medical school's range of requirements and criteria have been met.

What about tikanga Māori?

For Māori whānau, burial holds deep significance. Many whānau bring their tūpāpaku (the person who has died) back to the ancestral marae for tangihanga (the ceremony of mourning), and burial at the urupā — the ancestral burial ground — is central to many iwi's traditions. Under New Zealand law, tribal burial sites are exempt from the Burial and Cremation Act 1964, so that Māori can practise their own burial customs.

It is important to say clearly: tikanga around burial and the tangihanga varies between iwi, hapū, marae and whānau. There is no single Māori way. The kaumātua of the marae lead, and their guidance is what matters. If you are Māori and wish to record your wishes about where you want to be buried or how your tangihanga should be carried out, the most meaningful step you can take is to have that conversation with your whānau and your kaumātua — and then write it down so it travels with you.

Can you legally bind your executor to follow your wishes?

This is the part that surprises many people. You can set out any specific funeral arrangements that you want in your will, though those organising your funeral are not legally bound to follow those instructions. According to case law in New Zealand, it is the executor of your will who has the primary responsibility to organise your funeral. When making the burial decision, the executor must take into account any views you expressed as far as they are known — but they are not required to follow them absolutely.

There is also a practical reason to record your wishes somewhere other than your will: in the case of a will, it may not be located or read until after a person's funeral. By the time the will is opened, the decisions have already been made.

The best way to record your wishes

The single most effective thing you can do is have the conversation — with your executor, your partner, your whānau — and then write it down somewhere accessible. A Statement of Wishes is an important document that is not legally binding, but can accompany your will as guidance to your executor. Unlike your will, it doesn't need to go through the High Court's probate process. As such, it is immediately accessible to give clear direction around things such as organ donation, and your funeral wishes.

Your wishes document might cover:

• Burial or cremation, and where you would like your ashes scattered or your body buried
• Whether you want a tangihanga, a religious service, a gathering at home, or something entirely your own
• Music, readings, or people you would like to speak
• Organ or tissue donation wishes
• Any cultural or spiritual practices that matter to you

When writing your will, and when pre-planning your funeral, choose your executor carefully and discuss with them what you want to happen, for both your will and your funeral. The conversation matters just as much as the document.

Making it easy to find

A beautifully written document does no good if no one knows where it is. Keep your wishes with your will, tell your executor exactly where both live, and consider telling the people closest to you what you want. Te Hokinga ā Wairua End of Life Service is a free government tool with information and resources to help guide people facing the loss of a loved one, or to record your preferences ahead of time to make it easier on those who are left behind. It is available at endoflife.services.govt.nz.

Putting your wishes down in writing is not morbid. It is an act of love — a way of carrying some of the weight for the people who will grieve you. You cannot control everything that happens after you die, but you can make it clearer what mattered to you, and that matters enormously to the people left behind.

If you are ready to start recording your wishes, our planning ahead guide is here to walk you through it, gently and at your own pace.

Circumstances vary. Verify specific details directly with the relevant organisation before acting.

Written and reviewed with care by BesideYou.

Sources

• Funeral Directors Association of New Zealand: Burial or cremation
• Community Law New Zealand: Cremation — legal requirements
• New Zealand Law Society: Making a Will and Estate Administration
• Public Trust: Why you should have a Statement of Wishes
• Ministry of Health New Zealand: Burial and cremation
• Te Hokinga ā Wairua End of Life Service
• Water Cremation Aotearoa New Zealand
• Te Ara — The Encyclopedia of New Zealand: Tangihanga — death customs